A walk on the Wilde side.

Looking back, I don't think I ever wanted to be in the kind of relationship with any of my boy/man friends that constituted a marriage. I feel easier in male company than with most females I encounter, I enjoy the straightforward robust and quick wit of my male experiences. The complications arise when they read into my desire for their company to mean I want more of a partnership with them. I recognise now that I have gotten lost in their story and only end the entanglement when I no longer feel attracted to their company. How they look has altered for me to fit in with the reality of the situation as I claw my way back to myself.

It seems to me that it's difficult for men to be close friends with a woman without the woman having to sacrifice who they are in the process. Or is that just my experience? I risk losing male friends when they enter a relationship with someone who finds my presence a threat even though in reality I am no threat at all. But that's a reflection of the insecurity within that relationship, not mine. I don't know if it's because of my relationship with my mother that has led to the unease around women or if the women I meet project a lack of trust as they backbite and bitch, compete in jealousy. I'm not competitive, I prefer to be direct in my interactions and perfectly alright with what many perceive as my peculiarities. I find greater difficulty being straightforward with women unless it's a woman similar in attitude as myself. Is it possible for men and women to be close friends without one or the other having a hidden agenda do you think?